Roots of Discovery

In My Family Tree

When my third Great Grandfather, George Lancaster, lost his young wife in 1906 he was overwhelmed with widowhood. His three young children needed attention as well as his farm. Within the next year he courted and married Mary Birchfield who is my maternal third great grandmother. She was 19 years old to his 34 years.

Mary immediately took on the role of mother and wife on a working farm.

A month before their first wedding anniversary Mary had a daughter, Nettie. Two years later a second child was born to this union in September of 1910.

Mary took well to the role of wife and was a loving mother to all the children in her care. She was quite busy with 5 children and all the responsibilities of her new life. In the fall of 1910 her youngest child, Tessie, was baptized and the event was captured on camera. The picture below is the only image I have of Mary when she was young.

The Lancaster’s lived in the lowlands of Missouri which was prone to flooding and standing water. One benefit to this was a rich collection of soil. To this day the farmlands in the area are very productive. However, during the early 1900’s, the flooding was hitting the area hard year after year. In the early 1900’s, due to the wet soil conditions, there was an influx of mosquitoes.

Where there is standing swampy water there is a chance of getting Malaria.

“Malaria has always been a considerable problem in these lowlands of southeast Missouri. “Swamp fever,” “blackwater fever,” and “congestive chills” were of common occurrence. They held back the settlement of the country; families would spend a season or two in this country and then go back to the hills to get rid of their “chills.” The Malaria Problem of Southeast Missouri, K.F. Maxy, M.V. Ziegler Public Health Reports (1896-1970), Vol. 38, No. 6 (Feb. 9, 1923) pages 233-250.

Just before the Lancaster’s third wedding anniversary George passed away at the age of 37 of malaria. He left behind his 21 year old wife and 5 young children. During this time and place a young women with no substantial income had a hard time surviving alone. She had a home and land with taxes, food needs for people and animals, a farm, and children to care for.

Like many widows in this position and time she needed to remarry and quickly.

During her grief, and subsequent courtship, Mary was forced by her new fiancé to part with her three step children. She loved them dearly and they were the half siblings to her two young daughters. It was a hard adjustment for Mary to part with them but it was even harder on the children. They lost their father and the only home they ever knew. They were placed with their biological mother’s family within a few months.

Mary’s second husband, Jonas ‘Ed’ Petty, was from an affluent family in the area. This union quickly produced two more children. The couple welcomed a son named Chester and a daughter named Clara Lou Ella.

In 1917 there was a massive measles outbreak in the United States. Unfortunately, living in a rural community didn’t add protection from the virus. Mary lost two daughters, Tessie and Clara, from the measles. This left Mary and Ed with Nettie, from Mary’s first marriage to George Lancaster, and Chester from this marriage.

Her marriage to Ed proved to endure until the end of Mary’s life but it was not a loving one.

Ed Petty was imperious towards Mary and her daughter Nettie. He placed his only value on his biological child, Chester. Ed was a hard worker and continued to build wealth that he kept in what was rumored to be three banks. After his death the only person to inherit any of his savings was his son Chester. Ed was a lifelong philanderer and Mary, who was a beloved member of society, had to withstand this disrespect.

When Mary’s oldest daughter Nettie was 18 years old she married Rephah Hamilton in 1927. They had a small farm near Mary and over the next 8 years had three healthy children and one on the way. The story told through the family was that Rephah had a large tree branch fall and hit him over the head. He came home long enough to tell Nettie about the incident. He stated that he had to finish the job and after a drink of water and a short rest he left the house to return to work.

Once Rephah stepped on the porch he dropped to the floor and never recovered.

Nettie was 26 years old in 1935 with three young children and a baby on the way when she became a widow. She was in the same position that her mother Mary and her grandfather George were in. She needed to get married and quickly. Within the year she married again but before 1940 she was already divorced. After the marriage ended, with the help of her mother to watch her children, Nettie put herself through nursing school. She successfully graduated.

Nettie’s oldest daughter, Lawanda, died at the age of 30. Lawanda, a treasured teacher, was married with a young child. This created another shattered family and widower. From my third great grandfather to my great aunt it made four couples endure a continuing connecting line affected by widowhood.

Her death repeated the generational widowhood that trickled down through this family.

I can’t imagine the generational trauma this caused with each death and marriage. How did this effect the next generation? ‘Transgenerational grief, sometimes called transgenerational trauma, refers to situations where a grief event was so powerful within a family that it was carried on to the next generation and sometimes multiple generations thereafter.’ The Grief Recovery Method

Do you have generational trauma in your family? Any with lines of widowhood?

I wrote about Mary before. She is my ‘Hill Doctor’ ancestor and you can read more about her here!

Do you love stuffed mushrooms? My moms recipe is the best! Check her recipe out here!